Kids Say the Darndest Things

Here are a few of the things Joey's said/been saying lately:

One morning, he was hyper aware of his lower half after I took off his diaper and before I put on his underwear for the day. He stood in front of the fan, stiffened up like a soldier and said in a super weird voice:
"I'm naked! I'm a worm! And I live in a picture frame!!!!!"

On a drive home from somewhere as I was desperately trying to keep Joey from falling asleep prematurely, I turned on the Gummy Bear song and was singing and dancing, when an unimpressed Joey said:
"Mommy. You're OLD."

Most mornings, Stuart sleeps about an hour and a half to two hours later than the rest of us, and I know he has 9:30 meetings at work, so I have been asking Joey to go into the room and pet daddy's head and whisper, "Daddy. It's time to wake up." But, Stuart just informed me that for the last week, Joey has been charging in there and in a gruff, loud voice he's been saying,
"WAKE UP, FIRE TRUCK" and he's SO annoyed. It's the greatest.

One day, Stuart was taking a long time in the bathroom and I had the kids settled down on the couch to read the bible and we were right on schedule for bed time and I desperately wanted them to go to sleep asap. This was ruining our flow because Stuart's always the one to read the bible and I frantically said, "Hurry up! We've got momentum!" and Joey darted to the bathroom, peaked in and said, "DADDY! HURRY UP! WE'VE GOTTA MELT HIM!"

Soooo, Joey thinks the most hilarious thing in the world is to tell me stories of things that allegedly happened to him, and there's almost always the exact same story. He gets a kick out of it every. single. time.  Here's a variation:
"I was walking home and saw sidewalk, and dirt, and grass. And grass PUSHED me. And then blue doggy PUSHED GRASS, and then house PUSHED BLUE DOGGY. and then tree PUSHED HOUSE." He reallllly likes to say that inanimate objects pushed him/each other. and he thinks it's the funnies thing in the world.

ooo there are a thousand more things that are probably way funnier than these, but these are the ones that are, for whatever reason, sticking in my mind right now.  I'd say about half of what he says, I want to just put in a bottle and share with him when he's older. Alas, that's not how life works.

A few super sweet things he does lately:

Every time I take him scootering or to a new place (like the zoo, or to a pumpkin patch, or even a park) he says, "Mommy. Thanks. Thank-you so much for bringing me here. Thank-you." It's SO SWEET and he does it all of the time.

And randomly, while he's playing, he'll say, "Mommy. I just love you so much." He does that probably 5 times a day.  It's TO DIE FOR.

Joey is finally starting to want to play with Frankie and he's been SO encouraging to her lately.  Gone are the days of shoving her over for merely existing.  The other day I caught him crouching beside her as she chugged a train saying,
"Wow, Frankie! Good job! You're chugging a train! That's amazing!"