Poor Poor Pitiful Me

I was sick all of Christmas time. Well, that's not entirely true.
December 17th we arrived at my in-laws at 11:30 pm. It was so good to see them and we were excited! The next day everyone was healthy.  We went to my parents house for lunch and had a really nice time with Jesse, Sharalin, Anika, and Ben. My mom made SUCH a good lunch and we had SUCH a nice time. I'm glad I'm writing this out to recall, because this day really was a good day.

After the kids woke from their naps, we went to a restaurant to celebrate Stuart's parents 40th Anniversary.  It was... challenging. But also nice. Frankie and Joey were both going a little nuts from going to bed so late the night before and with us all being non stop busy with family as soon as we got there, and the meal at the restaurant lasted almost THREE hours! THREE hours! and a bunch of courses. With a one year old and a three year old this is no easy feat. I spent the hours entertaining the nieces, which was nice because I really love those little girls! And feeding Frankie and Joey of course. And trying to run after a Frankie who kept trying to escape. and occasionally taking a bite of food. And feeling frustrated and overwhelmed and a little upset that I wasn't with all the other adults enjoying their wine and not having to try to scarf down their food and participating in adult conversation. Buuut, this is the phase of life I'm in right now and they're all out of the phase and have older kids, so they should enjoy their time in the sun. I would just like to have a glimmer of that life again. Some day. like 6 years from now.

We went back to Dueck's for dessert around 8:30, which was WAY way easier because they kids could run around and play and I could sit with everyone and talk.  It ended up being a really nice evening there and the kids went to bed around 9:30/10:00.

And that's when it allllllll started.

Frankie woke up around 2 and I thought she was choking on her soother or something because she sounded terrible.  Stuart leapt up and started patting her back, as I watched,  horrified, as she barfed ALL over the pack-and-play, floor, and rug in a trail all the way to the bathroom after her realized what was going on in his delirious state. He held Frankie while I cleaned up the stinky, gross puke that was everywhere, rinsed the linens and put them in the washing machine (cuz you definitely don't wanna let that sit...) found fresh sheets and blankets, and we put her back to bed. 30 minutes later, the charade started all over again with more explosive puking. Once again, Stuart held Frankie while I put the other linens in the dryer, cleaned up all the barf, rinsed the new linens, put them in the washing machine, and took the cleaned linens and put them back in the crib.  Needless to say, it was a long night.

The next morning, Frankie seemed okay. She didn't have much of an appetite, but I chocked her throwing up on her having eaten a lot of rich foods at the restaurant that she isn't normally exposed to.

That day, Joey and Stuart spent some more time in the snow and Frankie and I putzed around in the house with Stuart's parents. I don't really remember what happened the rest of December 19th... Oh! I went to the mall during the kids naps to get a couple of last minute Christmas presents. And then at 5:00, Vanessa picked me up and we went to Cactus Club with Candace, who announced her pregnancy! Yahoo! We're all pregnant right now, which is pretty cool :) But, of course, Vanessa lives in Chilliwack, Candace lives in Langley, and I live in California, so we never see each other. But, it's still nice! :) We had a lot of fun and laughs at the restaurant, and unlike going out with my kids the previous evening, the three hours we spent sitting, laughing, and reminiscing went by in the blink of an eye. I brought Stuart home a blizzard and we hung out for a while,

The next morning was a nice quiet morning again at Dueck's.  At around 12:30, we put the kids down for their naps and Stuart and I went out for Sushi with Andrew, or 'Uncle Andrew' as Joey calls him.  Again, a super nice visit over lunch and nice to be out with Stuart.

When we got back to the house, the kids were up and playing and Andrew realized he had locked his keys in the car and had to stay for dinner. At dinner, Joey was acting weird and not eating the salmon that I kept raving before the meal that he would eat a tonne of, as it's his favorite meal. He refused to eat even a bite and said 'his mouth tasted weird' and I knew something must be wrong. After begging to be excused, he went over to the toys and started crying so hard. My poor guy had barfed all over a rug.  He was so distraught and I really don't think he's ever puked before, so he was confused and angry at me for not stopping him from doing it. :( "Mommy, why didn't you just make me not do it? Why weren't you with me?" etc.) It was so sad.  Then he threw up again. Then again and again. I put him to bed right away and Frankie hung out in the room with us while I put him down with a bucket beside him.  He was sitting up and asked me to count from a million to a million two hundred and twenty five.  I knewww this was him not wanting me to leave because he was sick and probably scared, so I rubbed his back while Frankie hugged me and counted.  By the time I got to a million two hundred and twenty, he barfed again into the bucket. And then again a few minutes later. I left to clean the bucket and talk to Stuart after laying Frankie down in her pack-n-play and when I got back in the room, he was sitting up again.  I sat by his bed and asked him if he had to throw up and he said no. I put the bucket in front of him and he was so upset with me. I think just because he was scared to throw up again. And sure enough, he did.  And then I led him to the bathroom and he threw up again, but this time it was so hard that it went through his nose and hurt his nose so bad and was stuck in his nasal cavity. He was bawling and telling me to get it out, which of course, I couldn't do.  I tried to suck it out with a boogie sucker thing, but that just made him freak out more. It took a long long time to settle him down and back to bed, but then he was okay.

He woke up once and sat up for a long time, but didn't throw up.  But I knew his tummy still felt unsettled.  The next day he acted fairly happy, but didn't have much of an appetite until right before his nap when he ate a small bowl of plain Cheerios.

At 3 pm, Stuart and I were in the TV room and I had the sudden urge to barf my brains out. Annnd I did.  This went on every 20 minutes for the next 9 hours. I've NEVER been so sick in my life. At around 10, feeling super dehydrated, I took a gulp of water that immediately exploded out of my throat and all over the floor. It was crazyyyy. I don't even know how I barfed for so long, as I had nothing left in my stomach whatsoever and I just kept retching and retching until about 12 am.  Stuart had gone to the movies with his brothers, so there was no one there to be with me. Well, Stuart's mom was, but it's not the same. I can't whine and complain to her and get babied and snuggled the way I needed to be, so I was feeling super sorry for myself.

The next day (the 22nd) was supposed to be the Christmas gathering at my parents house, and I phoned my mom around 10 and told her there was no way I'd make it.  She said she'd reschedule it for Christmas day and I felt so guilty because then my brother and his family wouldn't be able to make it as they already had another gathering to go to.

Stuart came home around 12:30 from the movie and laid with me in bed and I was finally able to calm my body down enough to fall asleep.  The next day I had no appetite and was more exhausted than anything from all my body had been through the previous day.  My dad came and took the kids first thing in the morning, which I was so grateful for, and I slept pretty well the entire day.  When I went to pick up the kids, I tried to have some chicken broth and promptly threw it up.  Stuart had plans again that evening with his brothers, so once again, I was sick and alone. I wanted him to go out. He said he'd stay home and that it would be no problem, but he had this night planned for a long time and I didn't know when the next time we'd be back in Chilliwack was and I didn't want him to suffer just because I had to. But, it still sucked :( I went to bed at 8:30 and had a super good sleep.

The next day was the Dueck gathering. I still was feeling pretty crappy and once again didn't eat all day.

Oh man. It's been a couple of days since I wrote the last time and I already don't feel like writing the rest of this post. RATS!

I guess I'll just do the rest as briefly as I can.

Christmas Eve: 
In the morning Jessica and Hinley came over and the kids played while we hung out. It was nice, but weird. I feel like so much of our lives have passed by since we last talked. It's been longer than ever that we've gone without talking (I think like three months!) so, not that it was awkward, but it felt like our friendship isn't what it used to be and it kind of bums me out. and I kind of think, meh. It is what it is.

In the afternoon while the kids were napping, Stuart came with me to run errands and I'm SO glad that he did. I was going to go on my own and have a pity party about not feeling good, but having him there made it fun.

Christmas eve night at the service JOEY. WENT. NUTS. He hated every living second of the service from the minute we walked into church. I haven't seen him have a tantrum like that since like a year ago. crying and yelling. yelling and crying. "I WANT TO GO! I DON'T WANT TO STAY HERE!" or my personal favorite, when the singing started, "MAKE EVERYONE STOP SINGING THIS SONG!" and crying his brains out. in my arms. while I held him with a vice grip. 15 minutes into things, and after having him calm for a little while, I could tell he was starting to get really anxious and stressed out again, just by the way his body was tensing up. He said quietly, "Mommy, I don't like this." and I knew the next thing that would happen is him crying and yelling again, so I just thought, 'You know what? The rest of Christmas has been a crap shoot. Why should I enjoy the Christmas eve service?' and took him downstairs to the nursery to play. (There were no workers there, so I couldn't have left him if I wanted to. Not that I wanted to because he wouldn't have known anyone and it would have been stressful for him all over again).

When I was downstairs with him, I got to talk to some super sweet other moms my age and their little ones, and it was actually not so bad. It just didn't feel like Christmas. Joey was so tired. I don't know why he was so tired! The service was at 5pm! He collapsed into my arms downstairs and said, "Mommy. I'm so tired. I just need to sleep." and he looked it!

When we got back to my parents house and everyone was getting ready to take pictures, I stripped Joey down and whisked him off to bed. My mom was disappointed because she wanted him to open his presents with everyone else. But, guess what? He. Needed. Sleep. End of story. I'm glad I made that decision. Stuart told me to keep him up, but I've never seen him so deliriously tired and unable to have a handle on his emotions as a result. I knew keeping him up = more meltdowns with no one to adequately deal with them but me and feel judgement raining down on me by my family members (whether perceived or real) and I wasn't about to be that frustrated, exhausted, sensitive person on Christmas eve night because at that point, I knew I couldn't really handle any more challenges.

The rest of the night went really well! The kids opened 2 small presents (I LOVE that our family doesn't do over the top gifts) and my brother and I each got a check from our parents. Super nice of them! And then we ate good food and played fun games until almost midnight! A fun time had by all!

Christmas Day:Frankie woke up at 6ish and I was sooo tired to go and get her because usually I try to go to sleep at 10 in anticipation. But with the late night, I was exhausted! But also excited because... well, it was Christmas day! I took her downstairs and played with her. It's so nice to play with only one of my kids in a completely quiet house first thing in the morning. There's something so peaceful about that I just love!

An hour and a half later, Joey woke up and wanted to open his Christmas present from Omi and PA. He was SO excited and it was adorable!! My mom came downstairs and watched him open it and then I got breakfast ready for the kids.

The morning was nice. Just playing and eating and the kids were really sweet, happy, and well behaved.

My mom realized she had forgotten a spice for her stuffing, so Stu, the kids, and I went over to Dueck's to say hi and borrow it. (Poultry Seasoning). I was actually really glad to have an excuse to go over there because I think they were slightly disappointed that they weren't going to see the kids on Christmas morning. It was SO nice going over there and we ended up staying for an hour or so.

When we got back, my grandparents were there and we visited together and with the kids. It was really nice to see them.

Right before lunch, I put Frankie down for a nap, which was SO nice for me because my parents don't have a high chair and her being at lunch with us would have meant me trying to feed her the whole time on my lap and having her squirm around or try to leave and head for the stairs.

Lunch was so enjoyable with my Oma, Opa, Uncle Dave, Grandma, Grandpa, my parents, Stuart, and Joey. Suddenly, it felt like Christmas time. The stars aligned. Suddenly, I sunk in my chair and was able to truly relax (and feel good!) for the first time in four days and just enjoy.  It. was. awesome.

Joey went down for a nap right after lunch and the adults hung around visiting, eating dessert, and drinking coffee for the next hour.  Of course, by 2 pm all of the elderly needed to be on their way and it was just us again. But, for that two hours of lunch and dessert, it was the most perfect Christmas I could have asked for.

At 5:30, we headed back to home base (Dueck's) and I made Stuart and I something small to eat after we got the kids tucked into bed at 7.  Stuart and I cuddled up and watched a movie. It was just the perfect day. <3

Boxing Day:I woke up in the middle of the night completely congested with a sore throat. I knew things were too good to be true!

Joey, Frankie, and I went over to my parents house first thing in the morning because I had forgotten my presents for my sister in laws. I'm really glad we went over there because it ended up being the last time we saw them before heading back home.

By the time we got back to the house, I felt sicker than before and at 9, everyone started arriving for the Christmas festivities to commence.

For some reason, Frankie needed me to hold her all day long and wouldn't let me put her down, and I was getting sicker by the minute.

The day was really actually super nice and everyone was so fun to be with and the food was great and everything was awesome, but I think I was just so burnt out. I was getting sicker and sicker and by the evening (yes, the event lasted from morning until night) I had chills, a headache, and couldn't breathe at all out of my nose. And a 30 pound Frankie was hanging off of me. And I was trying to be social. And do laundry. And pack. (We had to leave the house at 5 am the following morning).

Luckily, my knight in shining armor swooped in at 8 pm and said, "I'll do all the rest of the packing and organizing, you just relax." I needed so badly to hear that. And I knew I could fully trust him because he is a master organizer and I so am not. And I knew he wouldn't forget a single thing we brought or a single present and he'd make it all fit because he's amazing at that. I wouldn't have made it without his help.

Airport Day:
I was feeling sicker than ever. Woke up at 3 am and thought I might as well just stay up until we had to leave at 5 because I couldn't breathe anyway. BUT at 3:30, I came to my senses and went back to sleep for a little while.

I was in the back with the two little sweeties (who do SO WELL EARLY IN THE MORNING) they are SO CUTE WHEN YOU WAKE THEM UP EARLY!! Frankie just gets all giggly, and Joey says the funniest things with his puffy little eyes and his bed head and his tiny little smile) and Dueck's kept talking to us, but I was SO hot in the back (I think from being sick because everyone in the front had winter jackets on) and SO tired that I didn't answer anything they asked me and had my eyes closed.

The cuteness of our sweet children was what kept me from giving up at the airport as I went through all the lines deliriously and feeling sick. The need to take care of two other people while you're feeling sick really gives you an inner strength to push through when you wouldn't have been able to on your own.

The plane ride was so hard. Frankie got overtired and was crying her brains out in my arms and she finally conked out 15 minutes before we landed.

When we finally got home sweet home at 11:30, both kids went straight down for a nap.

WE WERE HOME!

I spent the next ... well, 4 days I guess since today is the 31st, being ultra sick, but 2 days ago, I got some antibiotics and am on the road to recovery. Yahoo!